Monday, March 24, 2008

Oh woe is me.

Dear Abby Voodoo:

Will you please advise me on how to tell our computer friends not to send "junk" e-mail? My husband and I annoyed with all the chain letters, jokes, cartoons, opinion letters, cutesy pictures, etc. we are receiving.

Signed,
Stupid Fuck


Dear Stupid Fuck:

What the fuck is wrong with you? Do you have some sort of short circuit in your brain? You honestly believe that, because you don't dig something, the rest of the world has to suck it up and accommodate you?

Some dipshit sends the same ol' shit that everyone else has been sending, and this is the biggest problem you have? There's a war going on, there's governmental idiots devaluing the dollar, gasoline's 4 bucks a gallon, there's a recession going on, there's a sub-prime loan mess, and this is the biggest gripe you have?

Give me a fucking break! Repeat after me: "The motherfucking world does not revolve around me."

Yeah, the shit's annoying, but ADULTS (which you aren't because you're wasting everyone's time writing into some advice columnist instead of dealing with shit yourself) shake their head, say "BYE" and throw the shit in the same place they would toss those stupid vinyl siding advertisements that wind up in their mailbox on Wednesdays: THE TRASH.

You see that key on your keyboard? The one that says "DEL"? That, is a delete key. It sends shit into the trash.

QUIT YOUR BITCHING AND LEARN HOW TO USE IT DAMMIT!

No comments: